Becuz eventually the boy im dating is going to break up with me, or the girl thats my best friend is going to stop being my friend, or move far away. So how can i stop getting so attached to people so quickly??
Attachment is a normal thing, although there are different styles of attachment and attachment disorders. It is absolutely necessary in developing relationships (all kinds, not just romantic). It sounds like you may have a fear of abandonment. I struggle with that quite intensely myself and it has impacted every relationship in my life. But you know what? It is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all. Life is full of beginnings and endings, hellos and good-byes. It is so painful at times, but we need to allow ourselves to mourn our losses, and it is a loss when someone breaks up with us, or moves, or decides they don’t want to be our friend anymore. New friends don’t fill the hole that is left when someone leaves, but they can bring incredible blessing and richness into our lives if we allow them to become close to us, and intimate with our hopes and dreams and griefs and fears. And by the way, intimacy is not necessarily sexual. So don’t push people away. We all need people in our lives who know us deeply and love us. Take care.
December 29th, 2009 at 6:39 pm
Keep ur gaurds up. Spend time on urself.
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December 29th, 2009 at 7:25 pm
Don’t get too close to anyone. You know your heart is going to break sometimes. So just accept reality. Don’t get too close or attached to anyone. Stay in your limits!(of kindness and attachment)
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December 29th, 2009 at 8:10 pm
Attachment is a normal thing, although there are different styles of attachment and attachment disorders. It is absolutely necessary in developing relationships (all kinds, not just romantic). It sounds like you may have a fear of abandonment. I struggle with that quite intensely myself and it has impacted every relationship in my life. But you know what? It is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all. Life is full of beginnings and endings, hellos and good-byes. It is so painful at times, but we need to allow ourselves to mourn our losses, and it is a loss when someone breaks up with us, or moves, or decides they don’t want to be our friend anymore. New friends don’t fill the hole that is left when someone leaves, but they can bring incredible blessing and richness into our lives if we allow them to become close to us, and intimate with our hopes and dreams and griefs and fears. And by the way, intimacy is not necessarily sexual. So don’t push people away. We all need people in our lives who know us deeply and love us. Take care.
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December 29th, 2009 at 8:56 pm
try to be able to read people better
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